Gooey Divinity: Peanut Butter Chocolate Brownies

There once was a weekend I got really busy.

It was as though all hell broke loose.

It was called Alabama in Saratoga. 

Then there was the weekend after that I offered to make a cake as a “Bon Voyage” cake for a girl I envied.

I dreamed about going abroad for a year while I offered and realized too late that I wasn’t that interested in doing so.

So I found a recipe and tried my damnedest to make something nice while I simultaneously made a brownie recipe from Martha. 

The cake came out fine.  People ate it and enjoyed it. 

The brownies came out DIVINE (albeit a little too gooey).

Peanut butter and chocolate: the ultimate pair. 

I used a lot of butter:

  

I globbed a lot of peanut butter:

I swirled to my heart’s content:

And then I enjoyed the middle piece of gooey, swirled peanut-butter-chocolate-y-goodness:

Then I ran out the door as quick as I could with a still-melting frosted cake, parked a half mile away from work, and was given many compliments on my serving skills and baking ability.  It was a good day.

The next day was great too, since I had peanut butter brownies for breakfast. 

Stress-Free Three Hours: Mint Chocolate Cupcakes

I applied to a job I really want.  It has to do with my degree (Psychology), it would relocate me to my best friend (they do exist!), and I would FINALLY get some experience so that I can get a job elsewhere.  Also, I am being recommended to it by an employee in the program (you can’t get anywhere without knowing people if you are perfectly average in every way). 

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before, but I stress bake and cook.  I just like to measure things and give it to people.  I don’t have a house to renovate (unless you consider my sister’s my house).  So I wander over to my sisters, use all her bowls and fridges and the stove and I allow my anxiety to be forgotten while I measure cup by cup and concentrate on not burning my skin or cutting off my fingers.  I tend to spill, burn, cut, drop, or generally ruin things if I don’t pay attention.  So I pay attention and forget everything else. 

I needed these this week.  I need to concentrate on perfecting the complex buttercream frosting.  I needed to measure the flour and the salt and all the ingredients.  I needed something to come out perfect.  I needed these. 

I was concentrating so hard that I didn’t have a chance to take pictures.  The only picture is the beautiful cupcake.  But I don’t care.  They were delicious and pretty and people seemed to like them. 

Sometimes, you just need a win.  This was it.

Found My Mind While Traveling: Brownie Cookies with Salted-Caramel Filling

This month has been hectic.  This month is track season.  I’m writing like I am living in the present, but this is a post about the month that has passed that I can look back on and think, “Watdahhell just happened?”  Track season started and I decided to travel.  I decided to put myself upon multiple friends so that I could remember what it’s like to have friends.  I decided to travel across Massachusetts. 

From where I live, I started in West Springfield, MA.  I visited my best friend.

Then I went to Worcester to visit a wonderful person. 

Then I ended up in Boston and met up with my old neighbor and then an old high school friend. 

If I were a better blogger, I would have brought a camera and taken photos of the time I spent in West Springfield laughing at the waitress who slipped and spilled half our food on the ground.  I would have taken photos of the frozen mojito/margarita Ally’s mom gave her (tequila in a mojito mix bucket is considered what?). I would have documented my time spent in the doorway of a dorm talking to an old friend who gave me back my high school class ring.  I would have taken photos of breakfast with someone I can always catch up with.  I would have snapped shots of the beers and the ridiculous amount of options of beers with Nick.  I would have told you about the crazy person I woke up to at 3AM in Allston.  I would have been able to show you all these things, but I was crazy. 

I was so crazy that when I made these cookies, this is the only photo I took.  I took only ONE photo of the entire recipe.  They are brownie cookies with a salted-caramel cream filling.  They were too moist, too delicious, and traveled across the state of Massachusetts.  They were the thank you and parting gifts for every person I visited.  They were delicious.  They were not from Martha. (WHAT?!) And now that I re-read the recipe, after a month, I realize that I did these absolutely wrong and I’m glad they tasted okay.  Maybe I’ll try them again.

Making Do: Snickerdoodles

Sometimes you get lazy.

Sometimes you need to sleep in late. 

Sometimes you have so much on your mind, you forget to look through your planner and find out you have more on your mind than you remember.

Sometimes you just don’t feel like going to the grocery store for ingredients.

Sometimes you just make do.

Sometimes, it’s that you HAVE to make do, but this week was not one of those weeks.  This was a lazy week. A week when I forgot about a lot of things. A week that I didn’t feel like going to the grocery store.  I made do.  I did what I could.  And for many years, I knew this as one cookie I could almost always do, as long as there was enough butter. 

I made snickerdoodles.  I think they’re tasty and easy and a people-pleasing kind of cookie.  They were the favorite of a co-worker.  My chef said it was just like his grandma used to make.  I’m glad they got eaten. 

Then I made a “special” one for my best friend.  It started like a heart, I promise.  Just doesn’t look like it post-bake.

They Taste Like Thanksgiving: Applesauce Spice Cupcakes

I’m not going to lie.  I didn’t try these. At all. 

I am unimpressed with the spices that I added, even if I added them correctly.   

I am unimpressed with everything but the applesauce.  I found an unsweeted, organic apple sauce from Vermont in my grocery store.   

I trust my loved ones enough to tell you that they seemed fine.  They ate the whole thing willingly and my sister didn’t complain that they were too dry. 

I trust the honesty of acquaintances that eat three in one sitting.  Another co-worker ate two.   My boss ate the entirety of one and said she doesn’t normally. 

I have faith in the statement that these were tasty enough to eat, not just because you’re hungry.

If I don’t like something, I don’t need to do it or eat it to see for myself if I have this much evidence.  I was there.  I smelled them.  I tasted the frosting.  I took their pictures.  I knew them, even if only a little. 

The frosting was a huge hit.  I don’t like cream cheese.  I particularly didn’t like this frosting because I couldn’t make it pretty.  Maybe it wasn’t totally the frosting’s fault, and it was the fault of the heat wave, but I still was mad. 

I will end this update with, “They taste like Thanksgiving.” My brother-in-laws only real comment while stuffing his face. 

Also, I ran out of cupcake wrappers.... 

Belated Birthday Cuppiecakes: Raspberry Swirled Cheesecake Cupcakes

I have an amazing friend. She and I have the same belief about keeping in touch: once a friend, always a friend.  (Mas o menos)  If we don’t talk for two, four, six weeks, but we want to talk randomly one day, a text, email, or even dreaded phone call will be written or made and we will catch up as though we did not miss a significant chunk of a year.

She is an amazing person.  She decided one day to take her health into her own hands.  She decided to start running.  She finished two marathons, half marathons, 5K’s, and a Warrior Dash.  She doesn’t give a crap about what anyone thinks about her.  She is nearly impossible to embarrass.  She observes more than I do, which I am always amazed to notice.  She can listen to me talk for 3 days straight.  She knows her limits and can honestly tell you her strengths.  She supports her friends when they want to do things.  She gave up chocolate (probably her worst vice) because her friend gave up alcohol (for 30 days).  She is simply an amazing person. 

I missed her birthday.  I was in the capital area while she was down on the longest island.  (I doubt it is actually the longest, but it is where she currently is located.)

So because of her awesomeness, and her giving up chocolate, I made her some cupcakes without chocolate.  I took a Megabus and the LIRR with six of these beauties.  I don’t like cheesecake still, but I think she might have enjoyed them.  I also brought a few into work, and they ate them up.  I think they looked pretty.

As You Wish: Strawberry Cupcakes

I went back to the beginning.  Vizzini told me to go back to the beginning.  So I have.  This is where I am, and this is where I will stay.  

Inigo was such a smart man. 

But I may not stay here. 

It was someone’s birthday this Saturday, so I decided to make cupcakes.  Brings me back to October, when I tricked Alayna into being my friend.  I had a few thoughts about making cupcakes and cookies and running and sleeping, but cupcakes pretty much won.  I mean, it’s tradition, right? (BUT WHYYYY?)

I had some problems. I lost count of my cups when I was doing the flour.  Made an extra six cupcakes. I don’t really know what I did. Whatever.

I had intentions of listening to Martha, but I decided against it.  I did not want to “finely chop” strawberries, so I used my Ninja (skillz). I got to use my Ninja (skillz) again when I need to puree the strawberries for the Strawberry Swiss Meringue Buttercream Frosting.  NOMNOMNOMNOM. 

My frosting wouldn’t set. Maybe because the heat wave that’s hitting the Northeast is wrecking EVERYTHING and my hair (I am very tired), but it was in the fridge for some time while I prayed it congealed.  I wanted to use a disgusting sounding word for my frosting, and I don’t want to fix it. It did not work, and I didn’t not bring the cupcakes in until the day after.  

I think they came out beautifully.  I went through 8.5 sticks of butter and three packs of strawberries.  (I threw out 3.5 sticks, though, so don’t worry about me!)

Add Chocolate and We Have a Turtle: Cashew Caramel Cookies

(Technically the title is wrong.  You need pecans for a turtle.  The Melting Poop has invaded my brain!)

There has been a lot of change in my life.  I went from cupcakes to cookies.
I quit the job that I felt crazy comfortable in.
I took a new job that will have me working at two restaurants in a new city.
I still work at the job that I've been complaining about since I got it, but I now feel more comfortable being at.
I have been too lazy to not end my sentences with prepositions.

But I made a new cookie.  My sister said, "THEY WERE TOO SWEET."  My brother-in-law ate four.  They were gone quite quickly on my last "Baked Goods Saturday" at Melting Poop.

I do hope that people in Saratoga enjoy sweets as much as they did at Melting Poop!

A Reasonable and Scary Fear Evasion: Cream-Filled Chocolate Sandwich Cookies

To whom it may concern;

I’m afraid that if I do something too much I will dislike it.  I don’t believe that I’ll ever stop loving pizza.  I don’t think that I’ll ever hate French fries.  But cupcakes?! I don’t want to lose my love for them.  So I took a break.  And I believe I will continue to take a break for a while from cupcakes.  So this week? COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES!

I’m so very picky about cookies.  I don’t like nuts in my sweets.  I don’t like having to drink something with my dessert.  I don’t like too much.  And I certainly need a good texture for it.  These cookies were wonderful for me.  AND! I tend to burn chocolate creations (because you can’t tell if they’re burnt or not… they’re ALREADY brown!), BUT I DIDN’T BURN THEM!

I did get a little bit antsy to eat them, so I ate some strawberries with the cream filling.  Don’t hate.  Delish. 

A few problems arose: I made the cookies too big and I made them too close together.  They were supposed to yield about 30, but I only made 22?  Whatevs.  The ugly ones got eaten by my co-workers and they didn’t seem to mind.  My beautiful picture is perfect cookies made without smooshing. 

They stack nicely. 

Sincerely,
I won’t ever get tired of sweets

(But these are terribly filling.)

A Summer Spent Smug: Tres Leches Cupcakes

Cinco de Mayo may be one of my favorite holidays.  It included quesadillas, nachos, tequila, Alayna, and Hannah.  I spent the “weekend” in New Hampshire with one of my best friends.  Therefore, I missed my Latin American cupcakes by a week.  I made tres leches cupcakes this weekend, reminding me of the summer I spent doing nothing by a pool.  Oh, how I miss the times of doing nothing. 

Tres leches means three milks.  The three milks involved are evaporated milk, sweetened condensed milk, and “milk” (which in this case was heavy  cream).  I made the cakes veeeewey cawrefullwy.  Then I poked holes in them real quick like.  And then poured the mixture of milks on them.  I made a really boring whipped cream to put on top and sprinkled them with cinnamon.  They turned out delicious and reminiscent of lazy days spent reading Roald Dahl. 

These tastes and scents and memories make me think of when I thought I had the whole world figured out.  Who knows who they want to be with when they grow up?  I still don’t know what I want to do.  I don’t know who I want to be, or be with, or what I want to spend the rest of my life doing.  I am very lost now and the cupcakes make me laugh thinking about how I thought I knew everything just a year ago. 

Minions Assemble!: Goodbye Cupcakes for Kayla

Sometimes, it’s not about what it’s made with except if it’s made with love. 

A good friend of everyone at my restaurant left recently.  I wanted to tell her how much everyone loved her.  I wanted her to know she is beautiful, inside and out.  She deserves love that is wholesome and overwhelming and all-encompassing.  She deserves someone who is attractive and funny and nice.  She deserves a prince charming.  She doesn’t know she deserves all this.  She barely realizes how wonderful she makes the world by being in it. 

For Easter, she got Despicable Me.  She frequently said, “WHAAAAAAAAAAAT???” at work.  She made me laugh with it.  So, I figured a way to show her how much we all loved her was to make some minions tell her…

MINIONS! ASSEMBLE!

It was a process.  It took some Twinkies, some extras, lots of patience, chocolate sprinkles, black frosting, white frosting, and cupcakes.  It also took some twisting of arms to get people to write down what they enthusiastically took.  But it all got done on time.  It was finished and she cried and I think she understands a fraction of the way people felt about her.  Because we all love her and her silliness more than she’ll ever know.  I’ll miss the friendship we weren’t allowed to have because of strange factors and moving to a different state. 

On the back of each speech bubble, people wrote special messages to her.  Our kitchen manager taped a brownie to it because she used to eat them all the time.  The restaurant hasn’t been the same since she left and it keeps changing.  Her move kind of got me thinking that I need to make a change, too.  The minions in my own head are growing restless and bored.  We’ll see where my minions take me.  

Back to Creating: German Chocolate Cupcakes

I’ve been quite busy, in case you didn’t notice.  And the last update was about how burnt out I’ve been feeling.   So I’ve been looking for new things to do, ways to help change the world.  I am pushing uphill to try to feel more and feed people less.  But cupcakes are still a way that I’ve been feeding people. 

Living near a real German woman has made me question things.  Like how to say streusel.  She started yelling at me in German on Easter because I said it a certain way.  I still haven’t found out what she was shouting at me.  I also question why these are called German Chocolate cupcakes.  But I made them.

The batter was tasty, but I don’t really like coconuts.  Or pecans.  But I toasted the pecans myself.  And I made the Coconut-Pecan frosting.  They were well-recieved.  Some people, smart people, actually knew what they were.  Otherwise I was left mumbling things about Germans and chocolate and coconut and nut allergies. 

Perhaps I could have cut a little neater, dried the frosting a bit more, strategically places the pecans to show the beauty of the frosting, but I figured they were meant to be eaten.  And my sister agreed, even if she doesn’t like coconut either.  (Could it be genetic?)

I made some more streusel cupcakes on Easter.  I played with puppies.  I played with twin babies.  And I made some pretty delicious food in the past few weeks.  I think I might be switching to cookies when I feel burnt out again.  I might be able to handle that.  We’ll see.  This week, I’ll be watching All American Rejects instead of baking.  Woo! Eighth grade all over again!  (Meet Rosie! :)) 

Don't Judge, Sweet Nostalgia: Betty Crocker's Boxed Cupcakes

I have been feeling burnt out.  I have been feeling tired and sore and sick of work.  I long for the days when I had no worries.  When the money I made went straight into my savings instead of into my checking to be used.  When the only caffeine I drank were the cold, sweet sips from the bottom of my mother’s tea.  When I used to walk around outside at 7AM in my Aladdin nightgown during the summer to find my father.  When the only fighting was the bickering between me and my sister (which I’m glad has since subsided, but it was nice when that was the only kind of fighting). 

When did I learn what passive aggression was?  When did work become something I needed to do instead of what I wanted to do?  When did my big toes become so calloused that I can’t feel them?  When did the weeks start to blend together to the point that three months have passed without me noticing? 

I went back to my old favorites.  I wanted something I loved.   I wanted to sleep.  I wanted easy.   So I bought some fruit, sushi, and boxed cupcakes (the best kind).  I bought canned frosting.  I wanted my childhood.  I wanted my fairy tale.  Fairy tales exist, even if only in my memory.

They were topped with rainbow sprinkles, because who doesn’t remember rainbow sprinkles in their childhood?  They were topped with Betty Crocker chocolate frosting.  They were nostalgia.  It was wonderful.  I ate three.  I took days off.  I will recover, just slowly.  I miss my friends.  

It Did Not Catch Fire: Pineapple Amaretto Cupcakes

The choice was not mine.  Like many things in life, I could not find something that interested me this week, so I let someone else choose.  I also made them on Sunday instead of Saturday.  The chosen cupcake included liquor I don’t care for, with many kinds of almonds, and pineapple.  The gentleman chooser has since decided that he is most definitely allergic to almonds. 

It was a fun new thing to try though. Although, if I could go back and do things over, I’d make sure my amaretto could flambé and the pineapple was ready before I warmed up the sugar.  You live, you learn.  I did get to try the amaretto my aunt made me for Christmas once though. 

They were topped with really plain whipped cream, so we added a little vanilla and some sugar.  Had I not been afraid that he was allergic to almonds, I probably would have halved the vanilla and added a little bit of almond extract, but anaphylactic shock is scary to me. 

They look pretty.  Not as pretty as Martha’s, but I can handle this.  I also ran out of time.  So many problems.  But they were nice to look at.  

Happy St. Patty's Day!: Brown Sugar Poundcake Cupcakes

My mother is about three-quarters Irish.  What we inherited in the Irish is a propensity for heavy drinking, being loud, and getting rosy.  I have very little Irish pride.  Sometimes I’m told I look Irish, but I think that’s just the dark hair and freckles.  I don’t even have the light eyes that look Irish.  But on St. Patrick’s Day, what good is no pride?  So, I made some delicious cupcakes for the day. 

They were brown sugar pound cake cupcakes.  Pretty delectable.  It was a Bailey’s Irish Cream Frosting.  It was SCRUMPTIOUS.  (I ate some at work with Girl Scout Shortbread Cookies and graham crackers.)  All in all, I created a cupcake that I enjoyed whole-heartedly. 

I made a stencil.  Then Matt made a better one.  So I stenciled four cupcakes and dusted the rest with the sugar because I was much too lazy to try to do them on every cupcake.  ALSO, work.  It sneaks up on you sometimes (every Saturday) and I had to wash my hair (because I rarely do). 

My sister said that these were number two best cupcakes (with my sense of taste).  She likes the birthday Streusel cupcakes a little bit better.  Success!

(Do I employ the use of parentheses too much? It’s the way I think, I swear.)

Where'd you go to school?: Boston (Cream Pie Cupcakes)

I went to school in Worcester.  It’s what people from not Massachusetts calls Boston.  It’s not true.  Worcester is wonderful in its own way.  Worcester has Corner Grille, Evo, Park Ave, Main South, Clark University, Baba Sushi, wonderful people, and four years of my life (and lots of my money). 

Boston is also beautiful.  It’s where I wanted to go to school, but somehow, I didn’t want to apply to any of the schools there.  So when I visit, I enjoy it.  I like the T and the stores and the beers and the food and the people and the sights.  One thing that Boston also has is Boston Cream Pies.  So I made some into cupcakes because Martha said I could.

Do I like pastry cream?  No.  Do I love semi-sweet chocolate? Not really.  Was the batter delicious? OF COURSE. (Did I eat one? Nope.)

What's up, Doc?: Carrot (Cake) Cupcakes

I have a funny thing about carrot cake.  My best friend likes them a whole lot.  She loves them with cream cheese frosting. She thinks it’s hard to find a good one. It was the first “sweet” thing she ever ate, at the age of one.  She and I lived different lives. 

I like carrots.  They’re good for your eyes (beta-carotene for the win!). They are crunchy and sweet. If you eat a whole bag of baby carrots on a car ride, you want to vomit when you reach your destination. They can fill you up and make you less hungry. You can eat them with some sugar as a kid (for no reason at all).

If you cook carrots, I’m not a big fan.  If you make carrots into a cake, I am less inclined (READ: NOT INCLINED AT ALL) to eat the cake.  Add cream cheese… you’ve lost me entirely.  But alas, I am running out of cupcakes that I truly want to eat in the book, so I made these.

I think the coolest part is that Martha told me to “finely grate” and I was too lazy, so you can see the carrot inside! But maybe I’m just weird and don’t eat carrot cake and know that’s how it comes.  Anyway, these were the first week of March.  I’m behind.